One could think that the purpose of our lives is to fulfill
the 613 commandments;
those that we do daily and those that come up when the
opportunity and season demands.
That though might seem to suggest that the Mitzvot as a
whole are unrelated together.
There must be a goal for ourselves in all this – Mitzvahs are
here for each and every one of us
to build and create our own unique soul according to its
needs, challenges and mission.
The Mitzvahs aren’t the goal – they are here to help you accomplish
your soul’s mission.
What is your souls mission? Then I will have a better idea
of fulfilling the Mitzvos in a more
organized and structured form to build and create myself.
Could it be that the sole purpose of my life is to be an
order taker without thought as to how
to take an active role in understanding why I am here? What
does the Almighty expect of me?
Why did he send me down here? It must be the Almighty’s
orders are helping me to accomplish
Something for myself (my purpose) and what the Almighty
wants for me.
The same difference is the following – I could do everything
my wife asks me to do including
picking up my dirty from the floor and I would be considered
a wonderful husband …sort of!
Is that really in the end of the day make me a satisfying spouse
for her. Certainly there are
certain things that if I did them would give her really great
pleasure and all the more so if
I did them not as some to do list that must be checked off.
Like bringing her flowers on Tuesday
as a surprise as oppose
to always bringing her flowers right
before Shabbos. But is that it?
Is that the ultimate nachas for her?
No! – There is going to be an area where she lacks, she
needs, she wants- and she needs you to
care about it, care about it because she cares about it –and
she wants you to attend to it –
do it – do it all the time. It’s something that you think
she could do herself, and why does she need
you and you feel totally put upon – and it’s not just once
you have to attend to this (and you find that
silly) but over and over again.
It could be that this one area of her insecurity is your sum
total of how to be the most outstanding husband
that will make the entire marriage. Caring for her about
this time and time again will spill over to everywhere
where you both can be found. It is this one are that you
have found your purpose of your marriage.
Becoming great in this area will give her the greatest source
of love and nachas.
Same is with our souls – that come down here to create and
build ourselves. It’s not just what Mitzvah
opportunity comes my way but which Mitzvos are here to build
my soul in which way. How am I supposed
to develop myself> which Mitzvos do I need to proactively
concentrate on? And how do I give the Almighty
the most nachas?
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